One of several secret formulas realized on a mountaintop at the height of Yeti mating season. Infused with Yeti approved ingredients like Caffeine, Eucalyptus, Moringa Oil, Grapefruit, Orange, Lemon, Wheat Protein, Rosemary,...

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Product Review

One of several secret formulas realized on a mountaintop at the height of Yeti mating season. Infused with Yeti approved ingredients like Caffeine, Eucalyptus, Moringa Oil, Grapefruit, Orange, Lemon, Wheat Protein, Rosemary, Sunflower, Shea Butter, Apple, Green Tea, Lavender, Retinol & Menthol. Leaves you feeling as exceptionally fresh and incredible as a roaring beast. 100% of the time it works all the time. Great for cleaning - and tingling - hard to reach orifices. RESTRICTIONS: Obviously, item is banned in and ineligible for shipment to Kyrzbekistan. DIRECTIONS: Lather like Beast. Rinse. Take cover from approaching admirers. CAUTION: Avoid contact with eyes, mountain gnomes and, if you are of the species homo sapiens, fully grown female Sasquatches / Yetis / Bigfoot as they get quite aggressive during mating season when they smell this scent. Made in the USA.

  • ALL IN ONE - a total body, invigorating smash of a shampoo-like cleanser that revitalizes hair, beard & body while attracting mates
  • NATURALLY ENERGIZING - inconceivable (& probably illegal) levels of Eucalyptus, Menthol, Caffeine, Vitamin C, Green Tea, Vitamins A & E, Moringa, Citrus, Grapefruit, Guarana, Sasquatch & more for an awakening natural scent
  • "Sasquatch Hand Size" - large liter pump top bottle (33 fl. oz. / 975 mL) fits perfect in a typical fully grown male Sasquatch palm, a best value that's outstanding at cleaning and adding tingle to hard-to-reach orifices
  • SULFATE FREE - free of Parabens, Sulfates, Phthalates, Synthetic Color, Paraffin, Gluten, DEA/TEA and Petrolatum
  • CRUELTY FREE, MADE IN USA, PREMIUM INGREDIENTS, NATURAL SCENT - Beast tested and approved (no Beasts were harmed in the making of this product; in fact, they all got dates).

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